I have been visiting the spirit world and renewing my powers.
Aries (March 21-April 19): Today you learn that you are named in a will - sadly not as a beneficiary but along the lines of "and all my worldly goods to my grandson providing he takes care of *your name*
Taurus (April 20-May 20): You should avoid water this month - though according to a close friend you already do. A chance encounter with a photographer may develop into something interesting.
Gemini (April 20-May 20): A promotion is always welcome so be prepared to congratulate the guy at the desk next to yours.
Lucky fruit - grapes (take some to his hospital bed after he trips down that flight of stairs)
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): It is better to give than to receive so you will be overjoyed at the tax bill heading your way on the first of the month.
Cancer (June 21-July 22): A dog will figure largely in your future if you are a postman or a vet. If you are a sailor it will be a whale. If you are a member of the clergy this may be a sheep.
Things to avoid - Cameras
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): This will be a productive month but be prepared with a small piece of cheese and some string.
Things to avoid - Mice
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Your house will be broken into later this month. Everything will be stolen, but replaced with identical copies.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): If asked to do a survey this week you should agree, but write 'none of the above' for each question. Ask them if you can have a copy for your files in case you forget your preferences.
Things to avoid - Watermelons
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You will take up a new hobby on the 23rd. It will be either knitting or hang gliding. Do not try to combine the two as this can lead to dropped stitches.
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): if you own a horse, this will be the year it wins at Badminton, Olympia, and the local showing class for three-legged veterans. Unfortunately this will occur the month after you decide to sell it and buy a poodle.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): This is a good month to buy a goat for milking. Be very sure to specify a female.
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): You will have a nightmare about the four horseman of the apocalypse only they will be named, Work, Xmas, Relatives and Turkey
WB Miss Tick. Those predictions are uncanny.
Icannot knit and am mortally scared of dying whilst looking daft( and being in high places without benefit of Building)
so I would just like to say
I nomnate Furby to knit for me and Eccles please can you take care of the hang gliding .im sure it will bring you closer to nature
thanks
Mwah Mwah! 
uffy the terminally useles at all things hand to eye!
Much as I like and respect you Uffy, you have as much chance of seeing me on a hang glider as being PM.
So, if I could have your vote for the Monster Raving Loony Party at the next election....
I will do the hobby knitting but only if you get the speech software installed on my PC so I can still post.
Well it's nice to know I'm going to be taken care of in my old age, and I hereby place on record that I plan to be every bit as easy to care for as all my aged relatives were for me 
Are the stars still one month old or has MC adjusted them this year.
Oh you can forget that now as it has all been sorted out.
We had a meeting at the Convention for Really Accurate Predictions and have made suitable adjustments. 
We also had a wonderful party aftwards. It turned out to be a good one so everybody turned up.
I'll vote for you Ecc! 
Merry I hope that when the time comes you can be relied on to be as stroppy and awkward as possible .. But with style and enough nouse to not sign over the deeds .. just keep on hinting! 